She knew the power that she possessed.

Born under the moonlight, the stars wailed in her distress.

She was intoxicating, no human could resist her charm.

She knew this, and with her power, she caused people harm.

She was the worst drugs all combined into one.

And once you took her in, she seemed lots of fun.

That’s when her games began to pull you in,

But this game, she knew you could never win.

She was beauty, beyond anything of this earth,

She was sin in all definitions of the word.

She was a deity, sent by Aphrodite,

Here to trick us, to punish me.

She’s the queen of broken hearts.

With a crown made of past lovers tears.

She’s a heartbreaker, a good one at that.

With a heart made of stone, and skin made of glass.

Deep down she’s just as broken,

But she doesn’t realise it.

Her ability to love has been lost in time,

So she insteads focuses on on taking others people’s love and calling it mine.

-Jhene (2019)

Warm hands holding on to a cold railing,

Makes you feel like walking on ice,

Is so much harder than ice skating.

When you fall, you get back up no matter what,

But what if this fall was worse?

And instead of ice skating it was the top of a building.

And there was no railing, but you fell anyways.

Sometimes you can’t even feel yourself fall

Falling is usually subtle at first,

The wind in you hair,

The rushing of something is the only thing you can hear.

How you fall is the real mystery.

Is it all at once? Does it take time?

Falling for people, now that’s the worst crime.

Falling in love, is like falling from a building.

If you’re lucky the person will love you back, and they will catch you.

If not, you will fall, and getting back up is always the issue.

Sometimes we fall and with it we break.

And everytime after when we fall,

Our skin turns into glass,

And we pick ourselves up, and glue ourselves back.

The glass will never be whole though,

And a part of us knows that.

But we try again anyways,

And we get our hearts broken again and again.

Till we can’t get up, and we’ve run out of glue.

That’s when we’ve truly fallen.

Falling is never fun, especially when you’ve never been catched.

You’d rather walk on ice,

Tip toe around the tall building,

The fear of falling and breaking,

Is greater than the chance to have feelings.

-Jhene (2019)

I’ve been thinking about you a lot. My heart rate increases just thinking about you, and I can’t

help but to daydream about the next time we make eye contact. I’m intoxicated by you. I think about seeing your smile when I should be thinking about that test I have next period, but I can’t. The only chemistry I can comprehend is what I feel between us. You are keeping me in one piece in a place where I’m being pulled apart. I force my arms by my side because if I didn’t my hands would magically find their way to your hair just so they could feel the softness. I can’t help it. I usually blurt out sentences but around you I hold my tongue. Your laugh is contagious and I would do anything to hear it every second of every day. You turn me into a hopeless romantic and I want to do all of the cliche couple things with you. Can you imagine? You and me, standing in the cold of the dark zoo, waiting for the light show to start. Me getting cold and huddling next to you for warmth, us both in insulated jackets, still cold. You pulling my beanie further down on my head as I adjust your scarf. Us walking together and seeing all the lights, making memories that we would one day tell our children. And at the end of the night, we would get hot chocolate while sitting in the warm confines of your car, joking about the cold weather, swearing to never do this again. When, in fact, we would do it again in a heartbeat if it meant spending time with each other. I dream about this imaginary life with you so much it’s starting to feel real, which will only make your rejection that much more painful. I know it’s not your fault, when I fall, I fall hard. I can see the pavement steadily approaching. After I confess, you’ll slowly stop talking to me, That’s after I’ve made the jump. Then you’ll tell me that we can’t be friends, the distance from the ground is approaching fast. Then you’ll either ignore me completely or you’ll find someone else. That when I’ll make contact, my body crushed and broken to the point of no return. Then I’ll slowly build myself back up but a part of me will be missing, and it will always be. Everytime that I have put myself back together, I am always missing a small part, soon, I will have nothing left. Years or mending and crushing will take its toll and I will be no more. One day I’ll jump and it’ll be the last time, no more coming back.

You are constantly on my mind, making it hard for me to focus on anything else. You make it race with thoughts after every conversation or interaction we have. I find it easier to hate myself through memories of you. I guess it’s been so long since I’ve had a good positive image of myself that I find it easier to create the appearance of someone I’m not in order to feel comfortable around you. I rarely tell anyone this, but I feel like I can trust you. And I don’t know what I want, but I know that all I want is you.

My Love,

I dream about you constantly. Our hands clasped together, you smiling at me. When I’m around you I feel lighter, like your helium and I’m the balloon. The parts of me that are broken, are fixed instantly when you smile. I can finally breathe, and the air has never tasted better. I love you more and more each day. I love that you are just as broken as me. My beloved, I love you.